31w4d

I can now see the 'light at the end of the tunnel.' I was so thankful to get to 28weeks, then 30weeks, now I want 32weeks. Honestly, I don't think I'll ever be 'ready' to give birth. I think regardless of the gestational week (even at term), I'll feel like it's 'too early.' When your baby is born prematurely, you carry a guilt that your body failed and your child suffered. I want to protect Cydney with everything I have, and the best way for me to do that, is for her to be in my womb. I do, however, have a sense of relief that is she was born soon, her NICU course would be much different than what we experienced with Coy. Obviously, if we can avoid the NICU completely, I won't complain, but it's nice to be *almost* 32 weeks.

I don't have much to update today. Everything is pretty much the same, thank God! I have really good days where I don't feel many contractions, and then I have days where everything is really irritable. My doctor is going to start checking my cervix once per week (I think starting tomorrow). The reason for this is because I have a cerclage (stitch) in place and if my cervix is fully effaced and dilating, the cerclage will have to be removed. The stitch wont break--it will tear my cervix. He said I may or may not have bleeding/pain and therefore, I may not be aware if something is changing. Obviously, that needs to be watched closely and prevented.

Coy and Chris came to visit Saturday and Sunday. I love spending time with them. It's nice to have 'family' time and just hang out. Coy is walking so good. He is everywhere and so proud of himself! We are so proud of him too!

I took some cute pictures of him today, but can't download them to this computer. Sorry, you won't see any good pictures until after I get back home! =)

Thanks for all your thoughts and prayers! We couldn't do this without your love and support.