Sunday, July 5, 2009

still here, still pregnant

Today I am 32w4d pregnant. That is amazing for me to think about. I now am aiming for 33weeks. I say that every week; "I just need to make it one more week, then I'll relax." I feel like I'm learning to swim and my dad keeps backing up in the water, making me panic a little and swim further to him. You feel like you could not possibly swim any further, but then you do because your choices are either to sink or keep swimming. That's kinda what a high risk pregnancy feels like for me.

I know this 'leg' of our journey will be ending soon, and I'm grateful and sad about that all in the same. I can't wait to meet our daughter and see what she looks like, kiss and snuggle with her, and become our family of four. But I'm trying to enjoy every kick and movement I feel because it will be the last time I will experience pregnancy. I can't envision us undertaking this journey again, and we're happy being the parents of 'two' kids. I get asked a lot if we plan on having any more kids and my response is: NOT FROM THIS UTERUS!

For whatever reason, my body was not cut out to carry babies. Although God has brought us through the desert twice (with Coy and this pregnancy), I could not physically or mentally do this or a difficult NICU stay again. Not willingly, at least. And, I'm okay with that. We are blessed beyond measure to be able to get pregnant and have children, regardless of the struggles it brings. But for us, two is a good stopping point and we feel peace with that.

In other news, I will have a BPP (Biophysical profile) on Tuesday, then my doctor will check my cervix again on Wednesday. Other than that, I'll just be hanging out enjoying the end of my 'rest' vacation. =)

Can you believe 34 weeks is only 1o days away? Crazy!


Vickirdh said...

Yay for 32 wks. 4 days!! Enjoy the rest because you know you won't get much when you get home!!! Still keeping you and your family in my prayers. Love, Vicki

Lauren said...

What a miracle!! You probably never imagined being 32w pregnant! This is sooo good for Cydney, and she must be thriving with all her time in the womb! I'm so happy for you!

In a way you never expecting to get this far with your pregnancy probably helped your hospital stay. If you knew that you'd be in the hospital this many weeks, you'd probably lose your mind, but since you took it week by week, it probably didn't seem quite as long!

Either way you look at it, God is looking out for you, and you will have a perfect, complete family!


Robyn said...

Ann Marie--You continue to be such a wonderful example of a Christian Woman! Even in the 'low moments', I see your true depth of character and committment to the Lord.

Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I'm so thrilled that we're still hanging out with Cydney in uetero.

God is so good and we continue to pray for you, Chris, Coy and Cydney...and you know I'll be calling when I'm in your area the next time. I'll need to hug and kiss on both of your kiddos!

Praying the time passes quickly and with enjoyment. Cherish every poke to the bladder and punch to the lungs. Those are the things I hated the most...and now I miss them the most.

Much love, Robyn

Hilary said...

You've done amazing!!!!

Tina said...

I'm so happy for you!

Snap said...

I keep remembering you saying *35* is the magic number. Look how close you are! YeeeHaaaaw!

I am Trish Marie said...

I do a little clap and dance every time I sign on and see you are still preggers! Yay!

People ask me all the time if Kenny and I are going to have a baby. Uh no thanks. We have been through enough already.

A Writer's World-Melissa Williams said...

Wow. You are just incredible, and I am in awe of your strength. I bet Mr. Coy can't wait to have his Mommy and baby sis home. Chris too, I'm sure. I'll be praying for an easy going last leg ... and delivery. Love you!

Daxton's Personal Assistant said...

Hi! So glad you found me! I'm so ridiculously happy that you're staying so pregnant :) Congrats! Little Miss Cydney is one lucky little girl to have such an awesome mommy, and so is her big brother. Can't wait to read through the whole blog to find out about you guys and Coy and all the madness and joy of the past 2 years. I'll definitely be keeping up with your progress and we'll be praying!

RyanAndrew2007 said...

Congrats on making it so far. You should be proud. You're an awesome Mommy both to Coy and Cydney.

I love the analogy of learning to swim. That's a great way to describe a high-rish pregnancy.

amyoutlaw said...

You're doing awesome! Keep her baking even if for a day! But I'm hoping 35+ weeks.


Momofsix said...

Ann Marie
I have a few more stitches to finish on the surprise I am making for your little doll.. and then it will be at your door step!
I hope to send it out friday! I am so glad you have made it this far!!!

Your Friend

lisaswendsen said...

It is crazy how much we have in common. In every pregnancy after Michael's (my first) I always said I would feel better once I hit 24 wks, 25 wks, and it never got better. Once you have expereinced what it is like to have a micro-preemie, I don't think you can sit back and relax until you have done all you can and have the baby. HOW AMAZING that you are so close to the end of this journey! You have done so well and I know you can stick out these last few weeks and then let you mind rest and be with both of your babies. You are doing so incredibly well. I can't wait to hear how things progress!