A Father's Love

Smiling Coy

Here's a short video of Coy smiling today. I am just so in love. I literally play with him all day (of course when he's not sleeping that is...!)

(And I apologize ahead of time for my annoying baby talking voice...=D)

I don't think it gets any cuter!

lovin life

Sorry it's been an entire week since I last posted! We've been busy, busy and then had a very relaxing weekend at the lake!

We spent Memorial Day weekend at a lake house, about an hour from our home in Houston. It was MUCH needed and we all had a wonderful time. I was nervous about bringing Coy somewhere to stay overnight (his first time since being home from the hospital!), but he did amazing! I am such a "first-timer" and did not realize how much stuff is required for such a tiny thing! I had 4 bags just for Coy's stuff and felt like I didn't bring enough! Chris was able to play two rounds of golf, and I spent some very cherished time poolside. Due to the VERY hot weather here, Coy stayed inside majority of the time. He spent time bonding with Grandma Kolkhorst, Aunt Mandy, Aunt Jenny and Cousin Ryder.




Coy has really developed into a different baby recently. He loves looking at objects, especially mirrors, lights, mobiles, etc. He is smiling like crazy and it's so much fun to see. He has also found his thumb! About 3am Saturday morning, I woke up and found him as content as can be sucking on his thumb. It was the cutest! He is now 9lb 15.5oz and feels so heavy to me! He is eating 4-5oz every 3-4 hours, but is still struggling with some reflux issues. He was started on Erythromycin last Tuesday; at first, it wasnt doing much for him, but lately, it seems to be helping. Please continue to pray for Coy to battle reflux! He gets really frightened when he senses something coming up. His eyes get very big, he stiffens up and afterward he lets out the most heart wrenching cry. It just kills me.






We saw Dr. Hittner last Thursday for an eye check up. She said his ROP was looking better. We will see her back in 3 weeks. Please continue to pray against ROP and nearsightedness. She said he was slightly nearsighted, but nothing severe and most likely will correct itself. She stated she does not foresee him needing contacts or glasses.




I also spoke with his Cardiologist about the recent bradycardic episodes. She ordered another holter monitor which he wore on Thursday. Please pray for everything to settle down with his heart. He only seems to have one episode daily and it's usually early in the morning. Like I've said before, I don't fully trust our apnea monitor.

Please also pray that Coy continues to develop. We have another ECI evaluation this Friday. I have also made an appointment with a private PT who has lots of experience with preemies for another opinion. I am just wanting lots of eyes on him, to make sure nothing is overlooked.

We continue to be blessed by all your love and support. Okay, that's all I can think of for now, If I left anything out, just ask! =)

(By the way, I am working on Thank You notes slowly but surely! I apologize for my tardiness!)

update

Thanks for all of your thoughts and suggestions! I can't tell you how much "experienced" moms help me!

We had a visit with the GI doctor today. I feel much better regarding the reflux/DGE (Delayed Gastric Emptying). He had another scary vomit/choke episode yesterday 3 hours after eating. I didn't even think of his DGE being worse as the cause of the worsening reflux/ lowered intake. But when talking to the GI doc, it totally makes sense. We are stopping Reglan and starting on a low dose of Erythromycin which helps stimulate the stomach and empty it. Hopefully, this will help with the feeding/reflux issues. We will stick with Zantac and try the Erythromycin; if no improvement in one week, I will be calling the GI back. He also suggested we stick with the Enfacare and only change one thing at a time. Thanks again for all your cares & concern! Reflux is a much larger issues than just "spitting up". I know all you reflux moms feel my pain!

The GI doc was very concerned when I mentioned the recent bradycardias and apneas. He suggested I call his Cardiologist immediately due to his heart arrhythmia, WPW. Coy did wear a holter monitor that I have not been informed of the results on a few weeks ago. I have a call into them but am waiting to hear back.

I also feel better regarding the apneas. When I told the GI doc that I can physically see his chest rising when his monitor beeps apnea at times, he told me about Obstructive Apnea. This means his diaphragm is physically moving, however, he's not moving air in or out. He also said, if his oxygen saturations drop during these episodes, they are real. I brought him home, and his monitor starts beeping again. I can physically see his chest rising, but also had him hooked up to the pulse oximeter. He was sating 96% throughout the entire "apnea." So, it would be my educated guess, that majority of these are false. I will still inform the cardiologist & pulmonologist about these "apnic" episodes.

We followed up with the Pedi; the blood culture was negative. She feels everything is okay, most likely reflux/ DGE related symptoms that will hopefully be helped with the Erythromycin. She has no explanation for the recent bradycardias or apneas; feels that most likely the monitor is wrong. It will be downloaded tomorrow, so we shall see.

Thanks again for all your prayers and thoughts! We are doing much better today. I am feeling better. When things starting going down, it is just overwhelming. The eyes, reflux, breathing, heart....Thank goodness we have such wonderful doctors and I have awesome support from family, friends, and all of you!

photo update

"Hey dad, what's up?"

Priceless
" I think it's time to take this off again."
"Go 'stros!"
"Lets see, what's down here?"
And he wants us to think he's sleeping!

a night in the ER

After a week of Coy not quite acting himself, we took him to the ER last night on the advice of our Pedi.

Last week, he became WAY more fussy than usual for him; I attributed this to switching from breast milk (I stopped pumping 8 weeks ago and we just ran out of milk) to formula and thought he had gas/reflux/constipation issues. I thought he maybe had some colic or we needed to switch his formula. Some feedings were great, some were miserable. Some he would take his 4 oz, some only 2 oz. He then had some projectile vomit and began refluxing way more than before. He's also had some diarrhea and then there's times he's straining (poor buddy). I talked to his GI doc and they said we should try a different formula, Enfamil Gentlease or Nutramagen. We tried these, and he did not want anything to do with them. (We see his GI doc tomorrow.

Last week, for the first time in the past 8 weeks, he had a sleeping brady. I figured that was strange and didn't get too excited over it, but then it happened again the next night. And, after the third consecutive night, I decided last Friday to bring him in to the Pedi. She noticed he was breathing faster than normal and decided we should get a chest xray. We had that done, looked normal, no pneumonia or fluid on his lungs. She told us to just keep a close eye on him over the weekend, if things worsened, we should bring him in to the ER. Saturday he was having a good day, seemed to be okay. However, on Sunday, he was only taking about 2 oz and that was us practically forcing him to eat. He also had another brady, and was having more apneas than usual. The apnea monitor is highly unreliable, but I did all my quality control checks and all seemed to be working. So, I usually take the alarms with a grain of salt because they are false alot, but these seemed to be accurate from what I could tell.

Last night, after his bottle, he was breathing super fast and shallow. He was also cool and clammy. I am always concerned with possible pneumonia because of aspirating (not that he gags or chokes and his feeds are thickened) but maybe he has some micro-aspiration?? I told Chris I was going to page his Pedi, but before I could even do it, she called us. She said she'd been thinking about Coy all weekend and just felt that we should bring him in and have everything checked out. She was concerned about possible fluid overload since he's gained so much weight, so quickly. Two weeks ago he was 7lb14oz, last night he was 9 lb5.5 oz.

So we brought him in. The nurses/doctors looked at me like I was crazy when I whipped out his 10 page discharge summary from his NICU stay and explained everything that was happening. They seemed a bit overwhelmed. (And of course, he's smiling, chewing on his pacifier, breathing normally, energetic, loving life while the ER docs are looking at him!) They looked at me and said "he looks good to us" like a was a bit crazy. He had another chest xray, blood culture, urine culture, and CBC done. The xray looked a "little" bit wet, so they decided to give him some Lasix. The CBC was completely normal. Of course, we wont have the culture results back until tomorrow or so. We were there for about 6 hours, and in those 6 hours, there's no telling how many germs we were all exposed to. Hopefully, we don't end up back there from something Coy contracted last night. ERs are really a catch 22.

We got home about 445am, and as soon as he's back in his bed, the apneas and bradys start again. I'm so confused and a bit frustrated. We will see his Pedi tomorrow to check on the culture results. We also see his GI doc tomorrow; I am thinking his reflux meds need to be changed. Maybe all this is stemming from his reflux??

Please pray for healing our sweet angel. Pray for him to pass this virus/bug/infection and for him to stay healthy and well!

(If anyone has any ideas of what's going on with him, feel free to comment!)

ROP treated

Coy's ROP did return. His eyes were treated by Dr. Hittner. We are so grateful to have such an amazing doctor. If treated correctly, ROP will not affect his central vision, only shorten his peripheral vision.

Please pray with us for God to completely heal Coy's eyes of any disease and keep them infection free! We go back next Thursday for another check up.

eyes/ robbery

Last Thursday, we saw Dr. Hittner to check on the status of Coy's ROP. In the two weeks prior, his eyes didn't improve, however, they didn't get worse. Please pray that Coy's eyes have indeed improved and God has restored them back to normal.

Also, I have good news to report....they caught the people who robbed the house across the street from us! In the section of our neighborhood, there is only one entrance and one exit. On Monday, an undercover police officer was hanging out at the entrance, when he spotted the car (I reported being involved in the robbery across the street last week) enter our section. He attempted to pull this car over, but they would not stop. There was a chase, even involving a HPD helicopter! They eventually stopped the people (1 woman, 2 men) and discovered they were in the country illegally from Columbia. They are being deported back to Columbia. The section we live in is small (only 50 houses or so) but they seemed to like what they found here. Houston is a huge city, why come back to the same small section of a neighborhood every Monday & Friday (the days they were robbing houses) ??? I guess they had other appointments Tues-Thurs and took the weekends off.

Mother's Day

Coy attacking Ryder....

First Mother's Day...
8 lbs 14 oz! (I grew one pound in one week!)

Have I mentioned that he rips the oxygen off his face on average 3 times daily?....
Great Grandma Cook holding Coy for the first time...

Great Grandma Kolkhorst holding Coy for the second time...
Anyone needing a chin? I have one to spare...

prayer request

Please keep Jessica Jones (a friend of one of Chris's cousins) in your thoughts and prayers. She was badly injured in a car accident last week. She was intubated and placed in medication induced coma. Pray for her complete and total healing.

"Give ear to my words, O Lord, consider my sighing. Listen to my cry for help, my King and my God, for to you I pray. In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." Psalm 5:1-3

mixed emotions

This past weekend was an emotional one for me. I was so thankful, sad, devastated, angry, happy; I was emotionally confused.

On Thursday evening, I learned that TWO people I love dearly are both pregnant; 20 minutes later, I found out the Lord had called baby girl McKenzie home. Her death was so quick, so sudden and unexpected. Being on the receiving end of one of God's great miracles, I had a hard time accepting that although our God gives, he also takes away. My emotions were suddenly all over the place; I was excited learning about my friends pregnancies, but then suddenly my heart was on the floor. Shortly after Coy was born, I was told by a Chaplain in the NICU that our happy and sad emotions are very closely associated. During Coy's NICU stay, my "feeling confusion" had never been so strong. It was literally, the best of times, but also the worst. I was elated, but deeply devastated; I was thankful, but down right angry. My "feeling confusion" returned this weekend. When Coy was in the NICU, I needed to be reminded that our God is always Good. In the wake of McKenzie's death, I was needing that same reminder.

I spent most of Saturday in mourning, thinking, trying to take everything in. I felt this guilt of having Coy; this thankfulness for him; this devastation for our friends who lost their baby girl; just shear shock of learning that she was no longer with us. I was never able to meet McKenzie, but became attached to her by praying and seeing her sweet face; witnessing her parents glowing when holding her brought back so many memories for me. Her mommy & I couldn't wait to get our babies together one day. She is so beautiful; she is now resting with the Lord. Please continue to keep McKenzie, her parents, family, and friends in your thoughts and prayers.

Mother's Day for me was bittersweet. I was blessed to spend the day with Chris, Coy, and our families, however, my thoughts and prayers remained with our friends who just suffered the loss of their sweet baby girl. I held onto Coy a little tighter, gave him a few more kisses, appreciated him more than before.

"...God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." Hebrews 12: 10-11

"May my cry come before you, O Lord; give me understanding according to your word. May my supplication come before you; deliver me according to your promise." Psalm 119:169-170

McKenzie Reese

"Answer me when I call to you, O my righteous God. Give me relief from my distress; be merciful to me and hear my prayer." Psalm 4:1

Baby girl McKenzie Reese passed away suddenly this morning. Please keep this precious family in your thoughts and prayers. I am asking everyone who reads this to stop and say a prayer for McKenzie and her beautiful parents. I have no other details at this time. Our hearts are broken.

the cutest

"Mom, I'm ready for my milk now..."



"What, no milk yet?"



"Okay, then I'll just eat my frog..."

An Inspiration

Here is the blog of a lady who is truly an inspiration to me. Her name is Angie Smith and she is blogging about her sweet baby girl Audrey, who is now an angel in heaven. Her faith is amazing. I thought I would share it with all of you. Just a warning: don't attempt to read at work!

Please keep Coy in your prayers today. We are going in to see Dr. Hittner at 330 to see if he needs treatment for his ROP. It also seems he is developing a cold or something like it. He's a bit stuffy, and he doesn't like the saline drops down his nose! (However, still eating (4 oz!) and saturating good.)

"Put me in Coach...

....I'm ready to play!"

I'm a growing boy!

March for Babies and prayer requests

On Sunday, April 27th, we participated in the March for Babies walk sponsored by the March of Dimes! We had t-shirts made, "Team Pray for Coy" on the front with his picture and birth stats on the back. The walk was such a blast! Thanks for the bottom of our hearts to all those who donated to support our cause! We raised way over what I was expecting! Thanks also to the Carroll family (and Miss Beth all the way from LA) for walking with us! (The baby is Cousin Ryder; Coy stayed home with daddy.)

Now I am asking all of you prayer warriors, who helped bring Coy back from the brink of death, to pray for the following families:

• Katherine Arnold Wolf--(for some reason, I can't get the link to work; here is the address: www.katherinewolf.info) Katherine Wolf is a 26 year old new mother who suffered an AVM, arteriovenous malformation, on Monday, April 21st. She immediately underwent a critcal 13 hour brain surgery and later emerged in a coma. She remains in ICU while showing steady signs of improvement. Her baby boy is just 6 months old. Please visit her website and keep this precious family in your thoughts and prayers. They are asking you pray Mark 5:41, "He took her by the hand and said to her, "Talitha koum!" (which means, "Little girl, I say to you, get up!")
• Sullivan Farrar- Baby Sully was born May 1st, 2007; he was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (ALL) on July 12, 2007. As he just celebrated his first birthday, he is fighting for his life at St. Jude Medical Center, receiving T cell injections. His leukemia has begun to grow rapidly, jumping from 2% to 12% in the past few days. Please pray for baby Sully to fight this leukemia!

I do not know either of these families personally, but have found them through the web and have grown attached to both. We know our God can perform miracles, he demonstrated this through Coy. Now ask him for complete and total healing of Katherine and Baby Sully!

weekend update

"I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. When I was in
distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands and my soul
refused to be comforted. I remembered you, O God, and I groaned; I mused, and my spirit grew faint. You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak. I
thought about the former days, the years of long ago; I remembered my songs in
the night. My heart mused and my spirit inquired: Will the Lord reject forever?
Will he never show his favor again? Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has
his promise failed for all time? Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in
anger withheld his compassion? Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: the years
of the right hand of the Most High." I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes,
I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will mediate on all your works and
consider all your mighty deeds. Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great
as our God? You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among
the peoples. With your mighty arm you redeemed the descendants of Jacob and
Joseph." Psalm 77:1-15

I love this Psalm! How perfect!

Now another scary incident to report....(we really need your prayer of protection right now!) On Friday afternoon (about 1pm) I witnessed two men walking through the yard of my neighbor directly across the street (they looked as if they were coming from the back yard, although I didn't actually see them come from the back yard.) A car was waiting in front of our house driven by a lady and the two men got in and they left. THIS WAS REALLY SUSPICIOUS and my gut feeling instantly told me something wasn't right. I had a friend over who had just left minutes before, so I called her and asked if a lady was waiting in her car on our street. My friend said yes, there was a woman in her car waiting in front of the mailbox just down the street from us (she just thought the lady was checking her mail.) I asked my friend to come back and drive around looking for this car--she did, and found it close by, driving slowly, without a license plate on the front or back (she didn't follow them two long, just long enough to see which direction that were headed)! Red Flag! I called the police, told them what I saw, not knowing if anything had actually happened because I didnot see them carrying anything, but wanting to be sure. Two police officers show up at my house within minutes, and I was actually thinking to myself, "oh great, they're gonna think I'm wasting their time, because I didn't actually see anything..." I told them what I saw, they were very understanding and agreed that something didn't seem right. The police officers then went to check things out across the street; sure enough, a back window had been busted out, and the house was ransacked. Geezzz...this is twice within two weeks, right next door and directly across the street.

So, the police leave and attempt to find the car (I got a good look at it) and suspects. No luck. I am not as scared, but just absolutely angry, that people actually live this way. Go get a JOB! Do something with your life! If they come to my house, I have two very loud, 5lb guard dogs that hear and see everything! My husband is a hunter, so we do have guns in the house, I would never want to use these, but gosh, I'm starting to think I better know how! That's really sad! You all probably think we live in a bad part of town, we don't! Our area is very new, nice, and family oriented! By the way, no one was home across the street, and they didn't have an alarm. The police estimate the suspects were in the house for about 45 minutes...they took jewelery, money, and bank documents. I only saw the people for a few seconds after my dogs started barking very loudly at the door....I'm glad I did because they have two young children that come home from school about 3pm, they would have walked into their house destroyed....the police think my friend leaving our house frightened the woman waiting in the car, because within minutes, the men were exiting the house. Anyway---please pray for protection over our house! We really need it right now! I NEVER would have imagined something like this happening in our neighborhood!

On to Coy....he weighed in at 7lb14oz this morning! He's such a big boy! He is fascinated with things these days, loves looking at light especially. Here are a few pictures from this weekend....

Me with my two very ferocious guard dogs, Dixie and Sugar Pie....

"Mr. Milk Man"
"I love my play mat!"



"Okay, Mom, I quit, please take me out of this thing..."
"I love my daddy!"

I took a picture of Coy's first diaper and shirt next to a 3x5 index card....look how far God has brought him!

Coy and Ryder

Coy with Cousin Ryder...