one day at a time...

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful." Hebrews 10:23

Since Coy was born, for the past 10 weeks, I have tried to take each day at a time. I remind myself daily to not put the "cart before the horse"; to enjoy this time with Coy; to cherish it. Yesterday, I felt like I was sinking deep, drowning in deep water and unable to come to the surface. I've had days like this before, but yesterday was worse; I was completely overwhelmed with emotion; anxiety, fear, worry....believe it or not, in the past 70 days, I have only cried 4 times at Coy's bedside....yesterday was one of those days. The bigger he gets (3 lb 1 oz!) and more he acts like a "newborn", the more I long to hold him and rock him to sleep, to feed him by a bottle, to smother him with kisses, to be his comfort when he's distressed...I am ready to bring him home. Most of the time, I have complete and total trust in the Lord; I know that neither Chris & I, nor Coy, could have made it this far without our Savior; but then there are times, when I am still so confused by everything, questioning, wanting answers, wanting to know what the future will bring...

The reason for my "overwhelming anxiety & worry" yesterday was due to an abnormal heart rhythm that was detected...we've been told before Coy has a condition called WPW, however he's never had any arrhythmias or abnormal tracings on his monitor that any of the nurses have noticed...yesterday he began having PACs and PVCs very frequently...he had and EKG & another Echo (the 4th one..) today....based on the results the Pedi Cardiologist suggested he start on Propranolol, a beta blocker that will help control these "extra" heartbeats...he will also wear another 24 Hour Holter monitor tomorrow...I was told by the Neonatologist that Coy's heart abnormalities would have been present even if he was a full term baby...so please pray for Coy's heart to function normally, without disease or disfunction...

So, after 10 hours of waiting on "the general" Dr. Hittner, we did not hear from her today. I asked several of the nurses, several times to page her for us to see when she would be by...they all kind of looked at me like "Are you crazy?" I guess they call her "the general" for a reason---she's a no nonsense kinda woman if you know what I mean...very good at what she does though....hopefully we'll hear from her tomorrow (2/12)...please continue to pray for healing of Coy's eyes; pray that it's God will to keep Coy free of surgery & for his eyes to heal & grow healthy...

Like I mentioned earlier, Coy now weighs 3 lbs 1 oz! He is "eating" 25cc every 3 hours and continues to tolerate it all! And, finally, he is wearing clothes everyday!!! I love dressing him up! He is still in an isolette which does have warmth inside it, however, the temperature inside the bed is no longer set to vary based on Coy's temperature; he must maintain his own temp!....here is a picture of him in a preemie outfit from today!!


He is still on a CPAP of 7 and was on 26% oxygen all day!! Pretty amazing for us to witness...I am so proud of him for breathing so well...!!

Please continue to pray for healing of Coy...specifically we are believing God will heal his eyes and heart! Please also pray for God to take all the worry, anxiety, and fear from me, that I will walk by faith, not by sight always! We are so grateful for all of you who are following Coy's story and praying for him & us!

Below is a pic of our new nephew and niece, Thomas and Macey, who we were able to meet for the first time this weekend! They are now 1 month old and so adorable!